My dream car….at least for now!

…or whatever the current Shelby is at the time I can afford one

I’ll even “settle” for a classic:

Published in: on Thursday, 2 August 07 at 3:06  Leave a Comment  

My thoughts on The Crossing (Part III)

Ok I know it’s in part two, and so very blatant but I find it to be my favorite of passages of the novel:

pg 146

“Such a man is a dreamer who wakes from a dream of to a greater sorrow yet. … The smallest mark upon the page exaggerates his presence. 

 This passage says so many things, and can even be directed to Billy.


Misc. tie ups to my other thoughts:                                                                                             As far as the horse being a spirit guide, you will notice throughout the entire novel, right to the end, there are some places that the horse cannot or will not go. Much like in a spirit quest, the guide guides, it does not take the journey with you.  Once certain things were completed, Billy would find his guide and get back on to his trek. 

…and just so you can sort of know where I am coming from the wolf, it is believed that after humans were created they became lost, so our creators sent wolves in human form to guide us. Wolves are in fact beyond knowledge, and language, and the world of man, and this novel echos that sentiment in great detail.

Published in: on Tuesday, 1 May 07 at 11:56  Leave a Comment  

My thoughts on the Crossing (Part II)

Epistemology, by definition is, because I did have to go look it up, is the theory of knowledge, especially with regard to it’s methods, validity and scope, as well as an investigation of what distinguishes justified belief from opinion.

There were a few passages that sparked an epistemological question or two throughout part two.  Especially in regards to justified beliefs versus opinions.  The rider that appears out of nowhere and &”knows” things.  Are they criminals? Demons in human form? Truly evil men? Or men who may “know” something beyond, what most men “know”. Can man hone animal instincts and know beyond their world?  Other questions include, when Billy shoots the wolf, how does he know that taking another beings life is okay in this circumstance and not another. Instinct? Logic? Or maybe he isn’t sure, but he shoots her anyway. Another passage that that stands out is Billy’s conversation with the sherriff when he returns from Mexico. The sheriff, tells Billy to follow the law (man’s law) and leave Boyd where he is.  Billy then politely lets, the sheriff know that there is a higher law maybe entre hermanos, or de la familia, or de Dios, that he will follow, and that he would be taking his brother.  Something else that stands out like a blond cheerleader at a goth party is when someone tells Billy he is an orphan.  The question is defiantly raised on how that knowledge flowed down the river and into this mind of a person never before met in the middle of nowhere Mexico!? Do they know beyond this world? Perhaps some humans have a sliver of the knowledge possessed by the wolf, and other sacred animals. 

By far the most epistemological passage in the novel begins on page 142 ” I was looking…” and ends on page 158 with “For nothing save the grace”.  These passages question the very knowledge of God, the belief in his knowledge, or all knowing ability, the validity of it, and how it effects the very world.  These pages are epistemology by definition. 


At this point in the novel, the journey is still very reminiscent of a spirit quest, with the horse as a guide, and Billy in the thick of it approaching the most difficult part of the quest.  Towards the middle of a journey there are still far more questions than answers with new ones formulating as minutes pass. 


Published in: on Tuesday, 1 May 07 at 11:44  Comments (1)  

My thoughts on the Crossing (Part I)

From the perspective of a woman with a Native American heritage, anything having to do with a wolf is never as simple as a black and white situation. I’d vote that it’s 99% grey area. The relationship between man and wolf is a complicated one that dates back to our creation story, therefore whenever the two interact, regardless of the apparent reason, it is always something much deeper than it appears to be.

In the beginning, Billy is simply a boy minding his father.  The pursuit of the wolf is nothing more than that a chore. pg 16″ If Mr. Echols were here, he’d catch her.  Yeah but he ain’t.” Clearly this isn’t Billy’s inspiration for adventure, he’s just minding his father. At this point the wolf is nothing more than an bothersome concept. The more billy pursues the wolf, the more his interest in finding her grows. 


The pursuit and eventual capture of the wolf is very reminiscent of a spirit quest.  You may have more than one guide as your journey sees fit, in Billy’s case he has the wolf and the horse.  As the wolf transforms from an ideal on pg 15 where Boyd asks about it, to a realization on page 52, where the wolf, “stands to meet him”, to a symbol of something more on pg 127, Billy bonds with her. He bonds with her like any student would with a teacher or a guiding force in his life. Most reminiscent of a spirit quest, are all the answers to questions not yet asked and the devlopment of questions not before thought of without answers yet when the trek of his journey that has the wolf as a guide ends.

Published in: on Tuesday, 1 May 07 at 11:14  Leave a Comment  

The complexities of mother daughter relationships

I watched the movie again with the world’s most knowlegable person aka my mom.

I made the offhand comment that Ana and her mom reminded me of her and Nannie (nay-nee…my grandmother). The extreme of love hate. She proceded to tell me what she thought and I felt it was definatley blog worthy.

She stated: In case you’ve forgotten, mothers are people, with feelings, ideals, dreams, and thoughts outside of thier children. Your Nannie wasn’t able to do so many things, and has a gentler personality and alot of regrets. Sometimes mom’s try to live thier life through thier kids and when thier kids decide to go thier own way it’s like failing all over again.  You and I have the relationship we have because of the relationship that Nannie and I have.


This made me flash all the way back to the Never Marry A Mexican story. Is it possible that Clemincia’s mother’s mother was so overbearing it made her completly back off from her children resulting in less of a bond?

Published in: on Wednesday, 18 April 07 at 11:39  Leave a Comment  

Things left unsaid…

I thoroughly enjoyed the 1st section of this collection. Especially My Friend Lucy who smells like corn, Eleven, and Barbie-Q.  


Young girls are dealing with adult problems in resilient ways. Burnt Barbie and Melted Midge are more than they could have expected.  Lucy who smells like corn, and her many sisters, have the workload of grown women, and yet somehow remain children.  Eleven, by far my favorite, explored the idea that even the most liberated feminist is still a three year old who may just need to cry.  I really feel like there was much to be explored in this first section. Sexuality in terms of boys versus girls, identity defined through relationships with siblings and parents, the teaching of the expected gender roles, and the special kind of helplessness that can only be portrayed by young women and girls. I think, (Dr C, hint hint,)  that there should be a class dedicated just to Sra. Cisneros and her works, it could be a cross over Chicano Lit, Women’s Studies type of course. I just wish we had more time with this and her other works.

Published in: on Tuesday, 10 April 07 at 4:16  Comments (1)  

Telenovela Wishes & Fairytale Dreams…

(In the voice of Robin Leach):

Every woman has a fantasy of her husband to be and married life. Many fantasies are within reason, kids, house, two-car garage, soccer mom car pools, or chats with the nanny, or whatever the case may be.  Srta. Cleofilas however had expectations of perfection and a telenovela lifestyle in which she would be the star.

            Unfortunately for our soñadora she got the ugly side of the telenovela. She successfully lands the role in (Young and the Restless theme plays in the background) “Naïve and Helpless” as the victim, the helpless, or the classic damsel in distress, in need of rescuing by a real man. Her marido perfefcto takes her away from her family and the only home she’s ever known, leaves her alone with the children, cheats on her, beats her, and holds no apologies for it.

 It’s a telenovela all right, but Cleofilas is not the leading lady, she’s simply a background character. She’s the unappreciated wife of the handsome charmer, the mother of the unattended children, the lady in the neighborhood who doesn’t speak English, the forgotten daughter, and the weak woman rescued by the strong liberated one.

…and like any telenovela the ending is bittersweet.  Celofilas, gets the strength to leave and is finally rescued.  Her knight in shining armor, or the handsome leading man doesn’t rescue her.  She is freed by two of the very things that allow woman to maintain the feminine struggle: Felice (Feliz) the pursuit of happiness with one’s self and Graciela (Gracefulness) the manner in which real women handle crisis and the very movement of femininity.



Published in: on Monday, 9 April 07 at 9:55  Leave a Comment  

One Holy Night

Truth much like beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  There are many truths out there.  Reality is what occurs when truths collide.  Ms Cisneros is brilliant at demonstrating the carnage after the collision. Each character in this selection has their own truth, and when those truths get challenged, the reality is as brutal as a thorn poke to an unexpecting index finger.

“Ixchel’s” truth is that she is more than an average girl in the barrio. Her very self confidence and identity are caught up in the truth that she is a descendant of royalty and has been especially chosen as a queen for a worthy king.

Abuela’s truth is that “Ixchel” is a child without sense and almost without fault. She blames the man boy baby and the uncle who doesn’t work as he should.  At a point she even blames the child for her lack of knowledge, and shame. (which is a conflict of truths within itse’f, you have to have knowledge to know to be ashamed.)

Boy Baby’s truth is that he is the descendant of ancient kings, and only he can carry on the legacy of this great ancestry.

The conflict occurs when the rest of the world’s truth show Boy Baby as a child molesting, serial killer who like most serial killers, is an average man from an average town and average life. 


Abuela’s conflict of truth occurs when the text reveals that she did not guide her nieta as she should have, and the consequences are irreversible, and the little girl part of her is lost or stunted.

“Ixchel’s” truths conflict when her royal life meet up with the fact that she is a child that has to work and handle adult responsiblities and make adult decisions with out adult level life experience.



When all of these truths collide they leave the horrible but educational carnage of innocence lost, dillusioned guardians, unmet expectations, too young ears learning about things they don’t need to know yet, and even loss of faith in people.  Much like a bad car wreck, you want to, but you can’t look away.  Shame, anger, lies, confusion, mistrust, knowlege, growth, womahood, and the conflict of many truths meld here creating the well presented, bitterweet cocktail of reality.

Reality  Truth

…which is why the quote at the beginning …” About the truth, if you give it to a person, then he has power over you. And if someone gives it to you then they have made themselves your slave. It is a strong magic. You can never take it back.” impacts the story in the way that it does. If you give the truth away to someone they have the ability to control you because they are now capable of destroying the your innermost truth that carries you.  If that truth is shattered your very essence could in turn be destroyed.  (Or vice versa, you could destrou someone by shattering thier truth. 

Love is a kind of truth, and one of the most artful puppet masters.  To be loved or to give love is a strong kind of magic that can never be taken back, when it is real.  For “Ixchel” that one night of giving and reciving love and respect, when the magic was strong and the moon was just right made her forever loyal to her king, creating the mircle and magic of conception, truly making it…one holy night.


Published in: on Monday, 9 April 07 at 8:35  Leave a Comment  

Sandra Cisneros & Reality

I’d like to better establish the point I was trying make in class, about what I walked away with from each story we read this week.

 In the “Eyes of Zapata” Cisneros tells the age old story of a woman who loves a man who is not hers to love, and who creates a situation in which to be okay with the fact that she has to share this man. This is something that continues to happen in everyday life.  She even thought if she had his baby she could keep him.  (Guys that never has and will never work) I know every one of you knows somebody who has liked/loved an unavailable person.  In this case the woman has chosen to take what is availble by way of children and comfort in the form of sex. 

The part I admire most about the story is the changing of this iconic man into an average Mexican man, who was once a boy, and like most men in some ways still is.  She remebers him before he was the great Zapata, and her view of him has not changed with his change in status. 

In “Never Marry a Mexican” I related very closely to this character, even though one class mate thought she was “skanky”.  The 1st half of my childhood we were very, very, very poor.  Then at the end of jr high we hit a windfall and have been blessed since then. When I went from innercity school to the “nicer” school, I felt like an outcast, but when my mom let me go back to my old school, I didn’t belong there anymore either.  What do you do when you feel like there is no world for you to belong to? You create your own world, with your own rules in order to make youself belong. Which I belive Clemencia did through her art and sexual liberation. She did what made her happy as opposed to the “right” thing to do. 

I also felt she was so hateful towards Megan, more because Megan was in her fathers position, as far as being cheated on, and continued to be weak and she was spiteful of that.  I also think She felt that Dru’s father and Owen were almost the same person in actions and appearances.  Even though Owen has done nothing wrong. She basically has misdirected her anger for her mother everywhere else, which is something that many woman have a tendency to do.

I also think to never marry a mexican not only means she wouldn’t marry one, but that no one would want to marry to her because she is Chicano/Mexican, so she just has to make do.

 Now, about her “skankiness”: If your only model of a realationship or marrige is a disfunctional one, would you be in a hurry to model it?  I should think not.  As far as her sleeping around, if she had a penis, would we have called him a bad name? No, we would say he’s young and single, and that’s what he should be doing. I think the same standard should be applied for females. She is single and has no children and no responsibilites other than to herself. She can do what ever she pleases. The only person wrong in this situation is Dru’s father. He made a comitment to Megan, it would be his duty to respect those vows and not allow this woman into thier home and thier lives. If he doesn’t respect his own vows why should that be Clemencia’s responsibility. 

To put it into a realistic prespective, if my husband/boyfriend/dude cheats on me, it’s his fault and my problem is with him, not the woman you would call a skank for messing with him. She made no comitment to respect or honor me, he did.  HE NOT SHE, is the bad guy in this situation, just like Dru’s father and Clemencia’s mother are WRONG WRONG WRONG!

Published in: on Friday, 30 March 07 at 11:13  Comments (2)  

Primative Actions

(What might this film be proposing about religion and Mexican culture?) 

The theme that seemed to reoccur the most was the phrase which included this land and people almost untouched by time and change, or something to that effect. The ideal of being primitave is often related to the ideal of being animal like in behavior and personality.  The director often showed comparison between this culture and simple animals.  He showed love birds and youngsteres in love, monkies and babies at play, as well as others but those two stood out. 


It also reminded me of a discussion we had in Bible study about the connection of man to animal.  It is belived that after the fall of man (or the firt sin) that three disconnectes occured one of which was between man and animal who were once in harmony in the garden.  It seems the people of Mexico were able to keep that connection and perhaps thier connection with God (or thier gods) in a way that technolgically advanced cultures are unable to. 

Published in: on Sunday, 25 March 07 at 7:30  Comments (1)